There is something about September that still feels like the beginning of a new learning year.
Fresh notebooks. Sharpened pencils. A calendar that suddenly looks more serious. A chance to return to good habits that may have gotten a little loose over the summer.
And in our working lives, September brings another reality: the fourth quarter is coming.
There is work to finish. Ideas to bring forward. Decisions to make. Commitments to keep. So it seems like a good time to ask: How do I want to show up for the work ahead?
Since January, we have been exploring Executive Presence…not as polish or charisma, but as the visible expression of how we lead. How we think, decide, communicate, respond when things get difficult and bring our particular gifts to the work.
This month, let's turn from the presence of the individual leader to what happens between us.
Because leadership is relational.
Relationships Are Part of the Work
Being a relational leader doesn't mean being the most social person in the room or the most liked.
Relational leadership is the intentional work of building the trust, understanding, credibility and connection that allow people to work effectively with and through one another.
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Years ago, when I was hired to lead HR for a manufacturing company, I knew we needed to raise the level of talent.
That would require changes in compensation and benefits.
I also knew I couldn't treat the CFO as the person I needed to “get past.” I needed him as a partner.
I learned more about cost and financial impact. He learned more about what attracting stronger talent required.
Neither of us abandoned what we were responsible for. Instead, we expanded our understanding of what the other was responsible for and committed ourselves to helping each other succeed.
That is relational leadership.
And it taught me something about influence.
Influence is our ability to shape thinking, choices, commitment and action without relying primarily on positional authority.
That matters in today's workplace, where responsibility, expertise, authority and decision-making aren't always neatly aligned. The org chart isn't enough.
The Human System
Every organization has the structure we can draw on paper and the way things actually get done.
The latter is a human system of relationships, trust, history, expertise, reputation, conversations and informal authority.
That is what I mean by the social architecture of presence: the human system through which our leadership becomes influence and people become able to accomplish something together. Leaders with presence understand this architecture.
People tell them what they need to hear, not simply what they want to hear. They know whom to bring together. They cross boundaries. They recognize where expertise sits. They know when a relationship needs attention before the work can move forward.
And they don't simply create strong relationships with other people. They help create strong relationships among other people.
Great leaders don't simply accumulate social capital. They create social capacity.
Perhaps this is where everything we've explored this year begins to come together.
Executive Presence isn't simply what happens when I walk into the room. It is what happens in the room because I am there and what can continue to happen after I leave.
Now look toward the final months of the year. Priorities shift. Budgets tighten. Deadlines loom. Next year's planning begins before this year's work is finished.
This is when our social architecture matters.
Fourth-quarter leadership isn't simply about working harder. It is knowing where to lean in, whom to bring in, which relationship needs strengthening, where influence will work better than authority and how I need to flex for what the work requires now.
Perhaps I need to be more decisive here and more curious there. Perhaps I need to repair a relationship before asking for something else. Perhaps I need to connect two people instead of carrying the work myself.
Your Practice This Month
So sharpen those September pencils and choose real work that needs to move before year-end.
Then ask:
- Who matters to getting this done?
- What matters to them?
- What might they need from me?
- And how might I need to flex the way I show up?
- Choose one relationship. One behavior. One new habit.
- Ask before advocating.
- Share context sooner.
- Invite disagreement.
- Make the introduction.
- Have the coffee.
- Offer help.
- And have some fun.
Because some of the best parts of leadership happen here - in the unexpected partnership, the exchange of ideas, the laughter during hard work and the realization that together we accomplished something none of us could have done alone.
Relationships create the pathways. Trust strengthens them. Influence allows leadership to travel across them.
Where could one intentional investment in your human system change what is possible before year-end?
I believe in you,
Join the Conversation
Let’s continue this discussion on LinkedIn. I’d love to hear your insights, experiences, and successes (or stumbles) as you strengthen your Emotional Intelligence.
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Here’s to a month of clear, impactful communication together!